


You Saved Me

by malecnificenttyrus11



Category: Love Victor (TV 2020)
Genre: AU Fic, Confessions, Injured!Victor, Letters, Love Victor - Freeform, OTH inspired, benji saves victor's life, fearless!benji, school shooting, worried!benji
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:01:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25212844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malecnificenttyrus11/pseuds/malecnificenttyrus11
Summary: Victor Salazar was already having a pretty shitty week. He just came out to his girlfriend, well...ex-girlfriend, Mia...who no longer wanted anything to do with him. And to make things worse...Benji still wouldn't talk to him. Victor takes Simon's advice and decides to be honest with Benji. He writes a letter...but what happens when a tragic incident prevents him from getting his apology to Benji? What happens when Benji risks everything to save Victor?
Relationships: Victor Salazar/Benji Campbell
Comments: 12
Kudos: 158





	1. Chapter 1

Victor walks into school, dropping his gaze down to the floor and walking slowly in the direction of his locker. 

Tightly gripped in his slightly-shaking hands is a neatly-folded paper, labeled with the letter 'B' on the front. It's the apology letter that he wrote to Benji after taking Simon's advice.

_ Maybe try and help Benji understand where you're coming from. _

He hopes that what he has written is enough to help Benji understand...or to atleast forgive him. 

_ Forgiveness...something that Victor isn't sure he'll be able to earn from anyone that he's lied to or hurt lately. _

His mind drifts over to Mia, and the difficult conversation that they had the previous night. After taking Simon's advice, he decided that he could no longer string Mia along...it wasn't fair to her or him.

_ I'm not going to sugarcoat it...telling Mia is going to be really, really hard. You just have to rip the gay-bandaid off and hope that eventually...she forgives you. _

So, that's exactly what he did. And Simon saying that it would be really, really hard was a vast understatement. It was one of the most difficult things he's ever had to do.

Mia took it about as well as to be expected. Much to his surprise, she wasn't angry...just confused, and hurt. She told him that she appreciated his honesty, but that she would need time away from him in order to process everything and decide whether or not she would be able to forgive him.

It seemed that the people he loved the most vanishing from his life had become somewhat of a trend. And the only person he could blame was himself.

_ He messed up everything, and all because he couldn't accept the part of himself that he'd repressed for so long. _

Victor shakes himself from his thoughts, eyes focusing back in on the paper in his hands. 

He hopes that his words, his honesty...will be enough to make Benji stay in his life. If he loses Benji...he isn't sure what he's going to do.

"Victor...hey!" Felix calls out, jogging to catch up to him. Victor snaps his head up to look over at his bestfriend, who falls into step beside him.

Victor forces a smile, "Hey."

"So...I just saw Mia and, judging by the look on her face...I'm assuming you told her everything." Felix says. 

Victor nods, frowning as he imagines the look of devastation and betrayal on Mia's face...the same look that he'd witnessed last night, which broke his heart.

_ He'd broken her heart. It was ironic, really...that he'd also gotten his heart broken in the process. _

"How did it go?" Felix asks.

Victor shrugs, "About as well as telling your girlfriend that you're..." he pauses, lowering the volume of his voice, " _gay_...can go."

Felix shoots him a sympathetic look, "I'm sorry, man. I can't even imagine how hard that must've been..."

Victor frowns, looking down at the ground, "It's okay. She deserved to know the truth...even if it means that she'll never talk to me again."

Felix reaches up a hand to grab Victor's shoulder, squeezing it, "Hey...don't beat yourself up over it. You did the right thing, and she will forgive you."

"I hope so..." Victor breathes out, twisting the paper around in his hands.

Felix loosens his grip on Victor's shoulder, letting his arm fall back down to his side. 

He glances down at the paper in Victor's hand,turning to shoot Victor a confused look, "What is _that_?"

Victor looks up at Felix, who's gesturing to the piece of paper in his hand, "Oh, uh...it's _nothing_. Just something for my creative writing class."

Felix raises an eyebrow, giving him a look of disbelief. He's just about to inquire further when Victor grabs his arm...halting his walking.

He stumbles slightly, glancing over at Victor...who's eyes are wide with panic. He follows Victor's gaze to further down the hallway, where a student is standing...gun pointed right in his direction.

Victor doesn't even hesitate as he jumps in front of Felix, grabbing his arm and yanking him towards the ground.

They hit the ground just as the deafening sound of the gunshot reverberates through the hallway, followed by the sound of glass shattering. Shards of glass from the library doors rain down onto Victor and Felix.

Victor feels tight pressure in his leg, followed by a strong burning sensation. He doesn't have time to look down before the hallway erupts into chaos.

Students begin to scream and run in all different directions. Their screams sound distant and fuzzy as Victor's ears start ringing. He tries to pull himself up, but students start to trample him. 

His eyes dart around frantically for any sign of Felix...but all he can see is a blur of colors flashing past him. His vision starts getting hazy around the edges...his body getting weaker.

Just as he begins to give in to the darkness consuming him, he can hear a voice come over the loudspeaker.

"Code Red, Code Red...this is not a drill..."

~

Felix runs out of the school, pushing through the crowd of students and frantically looking around for any sign of Victor.

His eyes land on Mia and Andrew, and he immediately runs over to them. 

"Mia...Andrew..." Felix says in between pants, bending over and trying to catch his breath, "Have you seen Victor?"

Mia flinches at the mention of Victor's name, clenching her jaw and shaking her head. 

"No...and I can't find Lake." Mia says, letting out a sob. 

Andrew immediately pulls Mia against his chest, wrapping his arms around her and resting his head on top of hers.

Felix's eyes widen, "L-Lake isn't with you guys?"

They both shake their heads, and Felix feels his heart sink into his stomach.

His eyes dart around the wave of students, desperately hoping to spot either of them. 

~

Benji sits silently in the car beside Derek, head leaning against the window and gaze fixated on the nature passing outside. 

There is a tense silence between them that can be cut with a knife, and Benji isn't sure what to do to fix it.

They hadn't spoken much since the previous night, when Benji had told Derek about the kiss between him and Victor in Willacoochie. It led to a pretty heated argument...more intense than any of the arguments they'd ever had before.

Benji wasn't sure whether or not their relationship would be able to recover from this, and honestly...

_ He wasn't sure if he wanted it to. _

Things had been off with Derek for a long time now, and Benji had spent a majority of that time in denial about the fact that his relationship was toxic, and far-from-perfect. 

There were so many things that happened between him and Derek to get them to this place. 

Derek's lack-of-interest and effort, his constant need to put Benji down and make him feel bad for his interests...for being a romantic. 

Victor kissing him was just the catalyst that led to Benji's realization...

_ Derek wasn't the right person for him. _

Benji knows that the way he had been treating Victor wasn't fair, and that he needed to apologize. 

He couldn't do that though, until he figured out the situation with Derek. Bringing Victor back into the equation too soon would only further complicate things.

Benji shakes himself from his thoughts, turning to glance over at Derek...who's gaze is locked on the road, jaw clenched and hands tightly gripping the steering wheel.

He's still pissed.

Benji decides that he doesn't have enough energy for arguing, so he shifts his gaze back to looking out the window...his mind drifting to thoughts of Victor.

A few minutes later...Benji is snapped out of his thoughts by Derek's voice, "What the _hell_?"

Benji glances over at him, furrowing his eyebrows. He turns to look out the front windshield, sitting up straight in his seat as he takes in the chaos unfolding in front of them.

Students are screaming and crying, frantically running in every direction. Teachers are quickly directing students onto various school busses, while other students are running towards their cars. 

Benji unbuckles his seatbelt, hoping out of the car and shutting the door. Derek follows suit, walking around the car to stand beside him.

His eyes dart around, finally landing on some familiar faces. In the distance, he sees Felix, Mia and Andrew. 

He pushes through the crowd of students and runs towards them...Derek following closely behind.

"Felix!" He calls out, grabbing the attention of all three of them.

He finally stops in front of them, glancing at all of them with a concerned look. Felix gives him a panicked look...while Mia looks at him with an unreadable expression that makes him slightly uncomfortable. 

"What's going on?" Benji asks, turning to look at Felix.

Felix frowns, "A student brought a gun into school and...he started shooting." 

Benji's eyes widen. He glances at the entire group...suddenly aware that Victor isn't with them. 

"Where's Victor?" Benji asks quietly.

Felix is silent, and Benji walks forward to grab his shoulders, shaking them slightly, "Felix...where's Victor!" he asks slightly louder.

Felix clenches his jaw, averting his gaze to the ground, "I...I don't know. We were near the library when the gun shot off...I lost him."

Benji feels his heart sink...a pit forming in his stomach.

"He...was shot?" Benji asks weakly, voice cracking.

Felix shakes his head, "No...I don't know. The gun was pointed at me and...he jumped in front of me." he whispers, tears welling up in his eyes.

Benji immediately moves to run towards the school, when a hand shoots out to grab his wrist. He turns around to see Derek standing there. 

"Benji...are you crazy?! There's an active shooter in there!" Derek says incredulously.

Benji pulls his wrist from Derek's grip, shooting him a glare, "I don't care! Victor is in there."

Derek narrows his eyes, clenching his jaw, "So?" 

"So...I'm going to find him." Benji snaps, giving him one final look before turning to run in the direction of the school. 

Felix immediately follows after him, "Benji! Wait!"

He catches up to Benji, grabbing his arm.

"Benji...Derek is right. It's too dangerous...we need to leave it up to the authorities." Felix says, and Benji pulls his arm away.

He turns around to look at Felix, "Felix...Victor is somewhere in there, alone...afraid. What if he's hurt, or..." his voice breaks, and he closes his eyes at the painful thought, "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to him while things are like this with us." 

Felix gives him a sympathetic look, slowly pulling his hand away from Benji's arm. 

Benji immediately turns around, running into the main entrance. Felix takes a deep breath, glancing back at his group of friends before running in after him.


	2. Chapter 2

Benji walks into the main hallway, eyes widening as he takes in the scene before him. There are books and papers scattered across the floor, lockers hanging open...backpacks abandoned. 

The lights are flickering...and it is so eerily silent that you can hear a pin drop. 

He slowly walks forward, trying to be as quiet as possible. He hears shuffling behind him, and spins around.

He lets out a breath of relief when he sees that it's just Felix.

"Felix...what are you doing in here?" Benji whispers loudly.

Felix walks closer to him, "I wasn't going to let you come in here by yourself."

Benji sighs, "Felix...you need to go back outside where it's safe."

He shakes his head, crossing his arms over his chest, "No...I'm not leaving. Victor is my bestfriend. And...Lake is in here. I need to find her."

Benji raises an eyebrow, "Lake? Why would you need to find Lake?"

Felix's eyes widen, and he looks down at the ground shyly. Benji can't help it as the corners of his mouth turn upward in a slight smile.

"Is something going on between the two of you?"

Felix clears his throat, "It's a long story...one that I don't have time to explain since we are kinda in the middle of a school shooting." 

Benji nods, face turning serious, "Right, yeah..." he pauses, "We should go to the main office and try to find something to carry with us for protection."

Felix nods, following Benji in the direction of the office.

~

Benji glances into the office, checking to make sure the coast is clear. He slowly walks inside, Felix trailing behind him. They both split up, going in opposite directions in search of anything they can use as protection.

Benji's eyes land on two abandoned baseball bats, and he grabs them...making his way in search of Felix.

Once he finds him, he offers him one of the bats.

Felix raises an eyebrow, "Benji...you do know that a baseball bat offers us zero protection against a projectile bullet, right?" 

Benji shoots him a glare, "Yes, Felix...I'm aware of that. Nothing that we find will offer us complete protection...but it's better than nothing." 

Felix nods, "You're right. I'm sorry...I wasn't trying to imply that you aren't smart, because I know that you're smart, and-"

"Felix..." Benji cuts him off, laughing softly, "It's fine."

Felix smiles, "Okay, cool..."

Benji walks around Felix, moving in the direction of the door. He's just about to reach for the doorknob when Felix speaks up...stopping him in his tracks.

"He's sorry...you know." 

Benji lowers his hand down to his side, turning to give him a confused look.

"What?" he asks.

Felix sighs, "Victor...he's sorry for kissing you. He's been beating himself up over it ever since it happened."

Benji frowns, being hit with a sudden, overwhelming wave of guilt.

"He doesn't have anything to be sorry for." Benji whispers, looking at the ground.

It's the truth. Victor doesn't have anything to apologize for, atleast to Benji. 

Benji pinned the blame for the kiss entirely on Victor...which was extremely unfair of him. He knows, just as well as Victor knows...that he also was to blame. 

He kissed Victor back. He had feelings for Victor, and was pining after him the entire time he'd known him, despite the fact that he had a boyfriend. 

Felix furrows his eyebrows, "What?"

"Victor kissed me, but...I kissed him back." he confesses, looking up to see Felix's eyes wide, lips parted as he processes Benji's words.

He sighs, "I was so confused, so...overwhelmed...that I took my frustrations about my own relationship out on him. I let him take the blame and then I...told him that we needed to stay away from eachother." 

Felix frowns, "Well...now it makes more sense why he's been so upset. Apart from the Mia thing...of course." 

"What 'Mia' thing?" Benji asks.

"Right...you didn't know about that." Felix says to himself, "After everything that went down between you two...Victor came out to Mia. He told her the truth about...you know..."

Benji's face falls, "Shit...I-I didn't know."

"Well obviously you didn't know...you weren't talking to him." Felix says, a slight jab evident in his words.

Benji frowns, looking down at the ground.

Felix sighs, "Look...you know that I like you, Benji...so don't take this personally but...Victor is my bestfriend. It's been...really hard seeing him hurting so much. And I can only help so much, since I don't completely understand what he's going through. But you do understand...because you've been there. And he really could have used your support." 

"I know...I could have handled it better. I should've been there for him..." Benji whispers.

"Yeah..." Felix agrees, "You could have. But it's okay, because you're here now. And it's obvious that you care about him too...since you ran into this school to find him."

Benji's eyes widen, the reality of the situation they're in dawning on him.

"Felix, oh God, what if he's...." His voice trails off. 

Felix shakes his head, putting the bat underneath his arm and resting his hands on Benji's shoulders.

"Benji...you can't think like that. You'll find him...he'll be okay." Felix reassures him, squeezing his shoulders before dropping his hands back down to his sides.

Benji closes his eyes...repeating Felix's words in his head like a mantra.

_ You'll find him. He'll be okay. _

_ You'll find him. He'll be okay. _

He nods, opening his eyes to look at Felix.

"Okay...I think we need to get going now." Felix says, and Benji nods.

They walk towards the door, looking out into the hallway to make sure it's clear. They grip their bats tightly in their hands, slowly walking forward.

Felix turns to walk in the opposite direction, pausing and glancing back at Benji.

"Benji..." He whispers.

Benji turns around to look at him.

"Be safe. And...bring Victor back to us."

He nods, "You, too. And I will...I promise."

Felix nods, giving him a small smile before turning around and disappearing around a corner...leaving Benji alone.

Benji slowly walks in the direction of the library, calculatedly stepping over strewn out textbooks and papers.

~

After what feels like an eternity, Benji finally reaches the entrance to the library. His eyes widen when he sees the shattered doors...shards of glass scattered across the floor.

He walks closer, a wave of nausea hitting him when he sees a pool of blood...and a trail leading into the library.

And beside it...an abandoned piece of paper with the letter 'B' written on it.

Benji steps through the door frame, slowly stepping over the glass shards and bending down to take the paper into his hands.

He spins the paper around between his fingers, frowning when he sees small dots of blood on it. 

He stands up slowly, glancing around to make sure he's still alone...before unfolding the paper.

_B,_

_First of all, I am so sorry for kissing you. But...please, just...hear me out. _ _I know that you must be confused about me kissing you, when I had a girlfriend. The truth is...I've been questioning, and well...confused about who I was for awhile now. And being around you, kissing you, helped me figure it out. I need you to know that I lied on the work trip. The machine was ready that day...but, I didn't tell you. I know that sounds really manipulative and shitty, but...being on that trip with you allowed for me to just...escape from reality, and escape from hiding who I was...atleast for one night. And being with you just made me feel...free...It always does. I know there is no excuse for me kissing you, especially when you have a boyfriend. I want you to know that I never intended on putting you in a tough spot, or hurting your relationship. I know that you probably want to hear me say that it was just an impulsive decision and that the kiss meant nothing, and maybe for you it didnt, but...I can't say that, because I would be lying to both you and myself. I like you a lot, B...I have for awhile. And I know this will probably put you in even more of a tough spot, so I'm sorry...but I needed to get it off my chest. I just wanted to say that I'm sorry again, and that I hope you can find it in your heart someday to forgive me. Because...you've become a really important part of my life, and...I don't want to lose you. I can't._

_Sincerely,_

_~~ Love ~~ , Victor" _

Benji bites his bottom lip, which is wobbling dangerously, as he fights back the tears welling up in his eyes. His whole body is shaking...the note nearly slipping from his hands.

_ This is Victor's note to him...this is Victor's blood on the note...the floor.  _

The thought nearly makes Benji collapse onto his knees. A tear rolls down his cheek, falling onto the paper. He carefully folds it back up...holding it to his chest and closing his eyes.

_ Please let him be alive...please let him be okay. _

This can't be the way that things are left between them. There are so many things that Benji wants the chance to say to Victor.

_ I'm sorry. _

_ That kiss meant everything to me. _

_ You mean everything to me. _

_ I like you, too. So much... _

Benji blinks back his tears, carefully sliding the letter into his pocket.

He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath and gathering his composure...tightening his grip on the bat as he slowly walks forward into the library, following the trail of blood.

~

Benji walks up the stairs to the library balcony, glancing around the completely abandoned room, which is as dark and eerily silent as the hallway. 

He slowly walks towards the steps that descend into the library, quietly walking down.

His eyes dart around, he glances over his shoulder and turns to walk backwards. He has the strange feeling that he isn't alone, which leaves him unsettled. 

A shuffling noise comes from behind a nearby bookshelf, stopping him dead in his tracks. He grips the bat so tight that his knuckles turn white. He takes a deep breath, slowly bringing the bat back as he edges around the bookshelf.

His eyes widen when he sees Victor on the floor, leaning up against the bookshelf.


	3. Chapter 3

"Victor..." Benji breathes out, dropping the bat from his hands and immediately falling down to his knees beside him.

Victor turns to look at Benji...his face a mixture of pained and relieved. 

"Benji?" Victor whispers weakly.

Benji sighs, "Victor...thank God you're okay, I was so worried." he admits, instinctively reaching out a hand to rest on Victor's knee.

Victor lets out a pained cry, grabbing onto Benji's wrist.

"My leg...I got cut by some glass." 

Benji looks down, eyes widening when he sees the pool of blood growing around Victor's shoe. 

He opens his mouth to speak, but Victor cuts him off.

"Benji...why are you here? You should be outside...where its safe." He asks.

Benji rests his other hand on top of Victor's, "Like I said...I was worried about you. I needed to make sure you were okay."

Victor furrows his eyebrows, "You...came in here to look for me?"

Benji nods, "Yeah..."

"Are you insane, Benji! You could've gotten yourself killed!" Victor reprimands him weakly.

Benji raises an eyebrow, "That's what you're concerned about...when you're bleeding out in the library?" 

Victor shrugs, "I guess so."

Benji rolls his eyes fondly, "Well, I'm fine. But you..." he pauses, looking down at Victor's leg, "clearly aren't. We need to get you somewhere safe."

Benji moves to stand up but Victor grabs his hand, "I can't...I can't walk, I tried. I crawled in here." he says, letting out a sob.

"Hey, it's okay..." Benji whispers, pushing a strand of hair out of Victor's face, "We'll stay here until its safe."

He moves to stand up, but Victor's grip on his hand tightens.

"Benji...please don't leave me." Victor pleads, a tear rolling down his cheek.

Benji is almost certain that there are several meanings to Victor's plea...all of which break his heart.

_ He can't believe that he ever made Victor think he would leave him willingly. _

Benji frowns, immediately kneeling back down beside him, "Hey...I'm just going to barricade the entrance. I'm not going to leave you."

Victor sniffles, looking down at the ground, "You already did."

Benji feels his heart shatter at Victor's words.

"Victor...look at me." Benji says softly, squeezing his hand.

Victor slowly looks over to meet his eyes, "I would never leave you. I'm sorry that I ever made you feel otherwise, but I promise...I won't." 

Victor nods, letting go of his hand.

Benji stands up, grabbing his bat off the ground and making his way towards the entrance.

~

After barricading the door as best as he can, he makes his way back over to Victor...putting his bat down on the ground and sliding down into the spot beside him.

He glances down at Victor's leg, moving closer to better analyze his injury. He frowns when he sees the tear in the leg of Victor's jeans...a gaping wound in his leg. 

"Vic...you're bleeding pretty bad. We're going to need to put some pressure on it." Benji whispers.

Victor nods his head, "Yeah...yeah, okay." he agrees.

Benji shifts his focus to unbuttoning his shirt, slowly sliding the fabric off of his shoulders and taking it into his hands.

Victor bites his lip at the sight of Benji in his tank top...a light blush appearing on his paler-then-normal cheeks.

Benji shifts so that he's facing Victor, "Okay...I'm going to use my shirt as a tourniquet. This is going to hurt...do you trust me?"

"I trust you."

Benji nods, leaning forward on his knees. He carefully slides his shirt around Victor's leg...double-knotting it tightly.

Victor hisses in pain, closing his eyes tightly and letting out a sob.

"Okay...that should help slow the bleeding. Are you okay?" He asks softly. 

Victor nods stiffly, lips pursed tightly together.

Benji falls back down beside Victor, silence falling between them.

"I'm getting tired..." Victor breathes out, head lightly falling down to rest on Benji's shoulder.

Benji's eyes widen, a feeling of panic coming over him.

"Hey...I know you're tired Victor, but I need you to stay awake for me, okay? I need you to keep your eyes open." Benji pleads, trying his best to keep his voice level.

Victor sighs, forcing his eyes open, "I'll try. Just...keep talking to me?"

Benji nods, "Of course. How about you tell me about a good day..." he suggests, knowing that the best way to keep Victor awake is to keep the conversation going.

_He needs Victor to stay awake._

"It was my first day at Creekwood, actually." Victor whispers.

Benji raises an eyebrow, "Really? I thought that was a pretty rough day for you...atleast from what I remember."

Victor nods, "It was. But...that was also the day that I met you."

Benji's eyes widen, and he glances down to look at Victor.

"I was so afraid of starting over in a new place...I was afraid of not fitting in, and I was terrified that people wouldn't accept me, for me. I spent my entire life back in Texas repressing my feelings...hiding who I was. I was convinced that I would never be able to feel free, or just feel..." Victor pauses, "And then I met you."

Victor smiles fondly at the memory of laying eyes on Benji for the first time. 

"And you were like a light at the end of the seemingly endless tunnel. You brought color into a world that had always been black-and-white...you gave me hope." he continues. 

Benji smiles softly.

"That's not just a good day...it was one of the best days." He finishes off.

"Wow..." Benji breathes out, eyes wide.

Victor laughs softly, "Yeah..."

"I lied to you about the job applications." Benji confesses, and Victor shifts his gaze to look up at him, raising an eyebrow.

"What?"

Benji laughs, "That night that I called you about the job at Brasstown...I told you that you were the only applicant. I lied...there were other applicants...several, actually."

"Why did you lie?" Victor asks, nuzzling his head more comfortably against Benji's shoulder. Benji's head falls on top of Victor's.

"Because, even though you didn't do the best at barista training..." he starts, and Victor cuts him off.

"I did terribly...you don't have to sugarcoat it." 

Benji laughs, shaking his head, "There's been worse...trust me. But...I don't know. There was just something about you from the moment I met you. I felt really...connected to you. And then you were so nervous and chaotic at training, and I just knew that you were the person I wanted to work with."

"So...I trashed the other applications and called you to offer you the job." Benji finishes off.

Victor smiles weakly, "I'm really glad you did."

"Me too." Benji agrees.

"I lied to you about something, too." Victor confesses, and Benji raises an eyebrow.

"What was it?"

Victor bites his lip, averting his gaze to the ground, "It was on the work trip, actually."

Benji nods, "I know."

Victor quickly sits up, hissing in pain as he moves his leg. He turns to look at Benji.

"You know?"

Benji reaches into his pocket, holding up the Victor's letter. Victor's eyes widen, him immediately looking at the ground.

"I was going to put that in your locker this morning...before, you know..." his voice drifts off, gesturing with his hand, "After the gun went off...I dropped it. I thought that I would never have the opportunity to give it to you."

Benji frowns, nodding his head.

"So...you read the whole letter?" Victor asks quietly, fidgeting his hands.

"Yeah, I did."

Victor nods, "Do you, um...do you forgive me?" he asks, his voice cracking.

Benji sighs, "No. I don't."

"Oh..." Victor breathes out, his face falling.

"I don't forgive you because you have nothing to be sorry for, Victor." Benji adds, and Victor raises his eyebrows.

"What?"

Benji shifts so that he's facing Victor, looking down briefly before looking up to meet his eyes, "You don't have anything to be sorry for. If anything...I should be the one apologizing to you."

"Benji..."

"No, Victor..." he cuts him off, "Yes you kissed me, but...I kissed you back. You and I both know that I did. And yet...you still covered for me. You let me pin the blame on you and you didn't fight it...why?"

Victor shrugs, "I don't know...because I wanted you to be happy. And if being with Derek was what made you happy, then I wanted that for you. Even if that meant you no longer wanted me as a part of your life."

"Being with Derek isn't what makes me happy. I'm happy when I'm with you." he confesses.

Victor's eyes widen, "What? But I thought..."

"I told Derek about our kiss and...he didn't take it well. It was in that moment, when you kissed me, that I realized what I wanted, no...needed. And it wasn't Derek. His anger towards the kiss just reaffirmed that." Benji explains.

Victor frowns, "I'm...sorry Benji."

Benji shrugs, "It's okay. I think I needed the push to finally break up with him. Something's been off with us for awhile. He makes me feel bad about myself a lot of the time, and he makes me anxious...all of the time..."

"But being with you...makes me feel like its okay to be myself." Benji confesses, smiling softly.

Victor smiles weakly, "That's how you make me feel too. It's how you've always made me feel." 

He leans back against the bookshelf, his energy slowly weakening. He closes his eyes, groaning in pain.

"I'm cold..." Victor whispers, shivering dangerously. 

Benji frowns, immediately shifting closer to him and cautiously pulling Victor into his arms. Victor rests his head against Benji's chest.

"I've got you...you're okay." Benji whispers.

Victor shifts so that his head is in Benji's lap, and he looks up to meet his eyes...his hand instinctively toying with the hem of Benji's shirt. 

"I just keep thinking about what will happen if we get out of here...I'm afraid." Victor admits.

Benji reaches down to brush Victor's hair out of his face, "We will get out of here, Victor. You don't have to be afraid...I would never let anything happen to you. I promise."

Victor inhales a shaky breath, "B...It's not glass, is it? In my leg?" 

Benji had been trying to ignore it the entire time he'd been here, but he couldn't anymore. It was obvious by the severity of the wound that it wasn't glass. 

Victor's injury was much more deadly than he wanted to admit to himself, and he couldn't accept it.

_He couldn't accept the possibility that he could lose Victor._

Benji shakes his head, "No...it's a bullet."

Victor closes his eyes, as if the words pained him. He opens them after a few seconds, looking up into Benji's eyes.

"I'm going to need to get you out of here soon, Vic." Benji whispers, "But I promise you...that I won't let anything happen to you."

He rests a hand against Victor's cheek, stroking the skin there gently with his thumb. Victor leans into the touch.

"You're always saving me, Benji. You don't even realize how many times you've saved me." Victor confesses, voice quiet.

Benji forces a smile, "Someone's got to."

Silence falls between them, and Benji feels his heart sink at Victor's sick appearance. His skin is abnormally pale, and his eyes are lidded...barely open. He feels so light in Benji's lap.

After a few minutes, Victor speaks up, barely a whisper, "If I say...that I love you, right now..." he pauses, taking a few shallow breaths, "will you hold it against me?"

Benji's hand stills in it's position on Victor's cheek, his eyes widening.

_Victor...loved him?_

_And did he...love Victor back?_

_Had he loved him all along?_

"...Because I've lost a lot of blood." Victor jokes, laughing weakly.

He forces his eyes open, locking them on Benji's. He pushes himself up onto his elbows, shaking slightly.

"There's something I want to do." Victor admits, eyes glancing down at Benji's lips before returning to his eyes.

He leans forward slowly, pressing his lips against Benji's. He reaches a hand up to rest it against Benji's cheek. 

Victor pulls away from the kiss, resting his forehead against Benji's. 

"Just incase you can't keep your promise." Victor whispers, lowering himself back down onto Benji's lap and closing his eyes.

Benji bites his lower lip, which is wobbling dangerously, as he fights back the tears threatening to fall over.

As he watches Victor grow weaker and weaker...the life in him slowly fading away, he's hit with the sudden realization.

_He loves him._

~

Awhile later, Benji glances down at Victor...frowning when he sees how shallow his breathing has become.

He looks down at his leg, which is still bleeding.

He knows that he has to get Victor out of her soon...before it's too late.

"Victor...hey." Benji whispers, resting a hand against his cheek.

Victor stirs slightly, opening his eyes a little. He hums in response, too weak to speak.

"I'm going to get you out of here now, okay? I'm going to carry you." He informs him.

Victor nods slightly, barely able to keep his head up. Benji carefully slides out from underneath Victor, kneeling down and wrapping one arm underneath Victor's legs, the other around his waist.

He stands up slowly, careful not to cause Victor any further pain.

Victor's head falls against Benji's chest, one hand weakly fisted into Benji's tank top.

"You're going to be okay..." Benji breathes out as he walks towards the library door, kicking it open with his foot and slowly walking out into the hallway.

He keeps repeating the words as he continues further into the hallway, carefully stepping over the shards of glass and through the door.

_You're going to be okay._

_You're going to be okay._

Benji's eyes dart paranoidly around the now completely dark hallway. It's eerily silent...the only sounds are Victor's shallow breaths and Benji's rapid heartbeat in his ears.

He freezes when he hears shuffling behind him, slowly turning around.

He lets out a breath of relief when he sees Felix and Lake walking towards him. Felix's eyes widen when he sees them, immediately bolting over to them.

"Victor...Oh God!" He cries out, his hand coming up to cover his mouth.

Lake walks over to stand beside Felix, resting a hand on his shoulder.

"We need to get out of here...now. It's not safe for us to be in here and, Victor needs an ambulance." Benji whispers in a shaky voice, turning to walk in the direction of the exit.

He quickens his pace, pushing the door open with his back and running into the courtyard. 

It's as if everything goes in slow motion in that moment. The SWAT team coming running towards them, first responders not far behind. 

He unwillingly lets these strangers take Victor out of his arms, slowly backing up to stand beside Felix and Lake with his hands in the air...allowing them to pat them down.

Benji looks around, seeing Mia, Andrew and Derek jogging towards them. He feels his knees buckle, and he falls to the ground...letting out a sob. Felix falls down beside him and wraps his arms around him. 

His eyes remain locked on Victor as they load him onto the ambulance...his world feeling as though it's spiraling out of control. 

He feels several more hands fall onto his back, and he tries to ground himself.

_He's going to be okay._


	4. Chapter 4

"What happened in there?!" Mia asks, eyes falling onto Benji...who's still on the ground beside Felix.

Benji frowns, "I...found Victor in the library. He was shot in the leg and...it was bad, really bad. If we would've left any later I'm pretty sure he would've..." his voice breaks, another sob escaping his throat.

Mia's eyes well up with tears, a single tear rolling down her cheek. Lake wraps her arms around her...Andrew resting a hand on her shoulder. 

"Oh god..." She whispers.

"This is my fault...he jumped in front of that bullet to protect me." Felix whispers, gaze distant.

Benji shakes his head, "It's not your fault, Felix. He would've done it for any one of us...and any of us would have done it for him."

Everyone collectively nods, all silently wiping at their tears.

Derek awkwardly clears his throat, and Benji slowly looks up at him.

"We all need to get away from here...it's still not safe. I'll drive you all to the hospital." He says.

He turns to meet Benji's eyes, offering his hand. Benji hesitates for a second, grabbing it and allowing him to pull him to his feet.

The group silently follows Derek in the direction of the parking lot, all piling into his car.

Benji's gaze immediately falls out the window, his stomach in knots. He doesn't even think about the uncomfortable feeling of sitting next to Derek...mind too focused on Victor.

He feels a hand rest on top of his, which is resting on the center console. He turns to look at Derek, who's giving him a sympathetic look.

He's never seen Derek look at him this way before, and it shocks him all the way to his core. It's like Derek is really seeing him, for the first time.

He gives him a weak smile of appreciation in return, turning to look back out the window.

The car ride feels like it lasts an eternity...nobody daring to speak up. It's as if the silence is the only thing holding everyone together.

~

They finally arrive at the hospital, all jumping out of the car. The whole group stops in front of Benji, giving him a pained expression as they look at his shirt.

He slowly looks down, eyes widening when he sees that his white undershirt is now covered with dried crimson blood.

_ Victor's blood. _

The thought makes Benji's knees buckle...Felix immediately grabbing his arm to hold him up straight.

The group all make their way towards the entrance of the ER...walking up to the front desk to ask for information. 

"Hi...how can I help you today?" The lady at the front desk asks.

Benji is unable to find his voice, and it appears that the entire group does as well. Derek steps forward, speaking up.

"We wanted to see if there was any information available about our friend who was just rushed here in an ambulance. His name is Victor Salazar." Derek explains.

Benji gives Derek a confused-but-grateful look.

The lady types into the computer, reading the screen before turning to look at them.

"It looks like they didn't need to operate. He's in stable condition...but the doctors are still checking him out. Feel free to wait in the waiting room until he's allowed visitors." She says.

They all nod, turning to walk in the direction of the waiting room.

Benji immediately falls into one of the chairs, exhaustion consuming him. He lets his head fall into his hands, tears burning behind his eyes.

A few seconds later, someone sits in the seat beside him, and he turns to see Derek.

"Derek...listen, I-" Benji starts, but Derek cuts him off.

"You...really care about him, don't you?" 

Benji's eyes widen, taken aback by the question. He knows he can't deny it any longer, or lie to Derek about it.

He nods his head, "Yeah, yeah...I do."

Derek nods, sitting back in the chair and folding his hands in his lap.

"You know...I spent practically our entire relationship making fun of every romantic gesture you ever made. I thought that they didn't have any meaning...and then I saw you run into that building today without hesitation and..." he pauses, "I realized how wrong I've been." 

Benji is stunned into silence, looking down at his lap and then back up.

"Benji...I'm sorry, for everything. I want you to be happy. And...I know that he makes you happy. So...I think we need to break up." Derek says, voice calm.

Benji nods, "I was going to say the same thing."

He's surprised...breaking up with Derek didn't hurt as much as he thought it would. Surprisingly, it was as if this was the most peaceful they'd ever been around eachother.

"I should probably go." Derek says, standing up from the chair.

Benji stands up, grabbing his arm, "Derek...thank you." 

Derek smiles, nodding his head, "He's going to be okay, Benji. You're going to be okay, too."

Benji laughs softly, looking down.

Derek says goodbye to everyone, walking out of the hospital.

Benji falls back down into his chair, taking a deep breath. He looks up to see Felix, Mia, Lake and Andrew walking towards him. Felix sits in the seat beside him, while the others sit across the aisle.

Felix rests a hand on his shoulder.

"How are you holding up?" he asks, and Benji shrugs.

"Honestly? I'm exhausted. But...I'm so relieved that he's okay." 

Felix nods, "Yeah...me too. And it's all because of you."

Benji smiles at him, turning to look at the rest of the group.

Andrew is giving him a sympathetic look, and Mia is giving him a small smile. 

Silence falls between them as they all sit comfortably together in the waiting room. A few minutes later, Felix jumps up from his seat.

"Victor's family is here." He says, and everyone's heads turn towards the doors, where Victor's family are quickly running through. 

Pilar locks eyes with the group, pointing towards them. The whole family makes their way over to them.

"Felix! Felix...are you okay?" Victor's mom cries out, pulling him into an embrace. He hugs her back, pulling away and nodding his head.

"Yeah...I'm okay." 

"Good. And how about the rest of you?" She asks, eyes scanning the group. Her eyes fall on Benji, and she frowns.

She looks over at Felix, gesturing towards Benji, who's head is in his hands...shirt covered in blood.

"Mr. and Mrs. Salazar...Benji was the one who ran into the school to find Victor. He was the one who carried him out." He explains.

Benji slowly stands up from his seat, giving them a small smile.

Mrs. Salazar walks over to him, immediately pulling him into a hug, "Oh...thank you so much for saving my mijo. Muchas gracias." she cries out.

She pulls away, wiping at her eyes.

"You're welcome. I wouldn't hesitate to do it again, Mrs. Salazar." 

She smiles, "You can call me Isabel."

He nods, "Okay...Isabel."

Mr. Salazar walks up to him next, offering his hand, "Thank you, son. Armando."

Benji shakes his hand, nodding, "Benji."

Pilar gives him a smile, and Adrian runs up to hug his legs. Benji stumbles slightly, raising an eyebrow and laughing.

"Thank you for saving my brother. You're like his knight-in-shining-armor." He exclaims, squeezing his leg tightly.

Benji pats him on the back, laughing when Mrs. Salazar pulls him away and gives him an apologetic look.

They all stand in the waiting room chatting, until a doctor walks towards them...clipboard in hand.

"Is there anyone here for Victor Salazar?"

~

The entire group immediately jumps up, all turning towards the doctor. Victor's parents quickly make their way over, followed by everyone else.

"We're his parents. How is he?" Isabel asks, chewing her lip nervously.

The doctor folds the clipboard underneath his arm, giving them a small smile.

"The good news is...he didn't require emergency surgery. The bullet is still inside his leg...but it won't cause any further complications." He informs them.

Everyone collectively sighs in relief.

"He did, however...lose a significant amount of blood. The tourniquet around his leg prevented him from bleeding out entirely. It's what saved his life." The doctor continues.

Everyone's eyes all immediately turn to land on Benji...who's eyes are wide.

_ He...saved Victor's life. _

"Judging by the looks of everyone...it appears that you are the one who tied the tourniquet. Good thinking, son...you saved your friend's life." The doctor says, giving him a nod.

The doctor turns to continue talking to Victor's family, and Benji falls back into the nearest chair, gaze distant.

He really saved Victor's life. If he hadn't gone into that school...if he hadn't used his shirt as a tourniquet...Victor would have...

He would be...

Benji closes his eyes and lets out a breath that he didn't know he was holding. He hears footsteps approaching him, and sees the group standing around him.

"Hey...they're allowing for visitors now. He keeps asking for you." Felix says.

Benji smiles, standing up from his chair and following the path towards Victor's room. He peeks inside the door, smiling when he sees Victor laying there.

He quietly pushes the door open, walking inside and leaning against the doorframe.

Victor turns to look at him, a weak grin on his face, "Hey..."

"Hey..." Benji breathes out.

"So...I heard that I should be thanking you for saving my life...literally, this time." Victor says.

Benji pushes himself off the doorframe, shrugging as he walks to stand beside Victor's bed. 

"I guess so." He says, smirking.

Victor's face turns serious, "Thank you, Benji. For not giving up on me...for finding me, for...saving me." 

Benji smiles, "Thank you for saving me, too."

He sits down carefully beside Victor on the bed, reaching over to grab his hand. 

"So...about what you said earlier." Benji says.

Victor's eyes widen, him immediately shifting his gaze away.

"I'm sorry. I know that was intense and not good timing and...I lost a lot of blood-" Victor rambles, and Benji smiles.

"Did you mean it?" He asks.

Victor is silent for a moment, nodding his head, "Yeah. It's okay if you don't feel the same. I know that you're with Derek and-"

"I love you, too." Benji cuts him off.

Victor's head shoots around to face him, eyes wide.

"You...you do?" Victor asks.

Benji squeezes his hand, "I do."

Victor smiles, looking down and laughing softly in disbelief.

"And...we broke up. Me and Derek. He told me that I deserve to be happy, and that he knows you make me happy." Benji explains.

"Wow...that was, unexpected." Victor whispers, and Benji nods.

Benji's thumb softly strokes the skin on Victor's knuckles.

"Can I kiss you?" Victor asks suddenly, making Benji freeze.

He raises an eyebrow, "I mean, of course. But...are you sure you want to? I know you aren't out yet."

Victor nods, "Just...kiss me."

Benji immediately leans forward, resting his hand against Victor's cheek and leaning in to connect their lips together. Victor's hand moves up to tangle in Benji's hair.

Their lips move together for a few seconds, until the sound of the door opening makes them spring apart.

Benji jumps off the bed just as Victor's family walks into the room. He walks over to the empty chair in the corner...giving the family space.

"Oh, mijo! I'm so glad you're okay!" Isabel cries out, leaning over to hug him and press a kiss to his forehead.

Victor's father walks to the other side of the bed, squeezing his shoulder. Adrian jumps up onto the bed, curling into Victor's side.

Benji smiles fondly at them.

Silence falls between them, and Victor looks up to lock eyes briefly with Benji...before turning to look at his family.

"Mom, Dad, Pilar...there's something I have to say." He announces, grabbing their attention.

Isabel smiles, "Of course, mi amor. What is it?"

Benji raises an eyebrow, confused about what is happening.

Victor glances over at him, turning to look at his parents.

"There's something I've been hiding from you guys for awhile because...I was afraid of how you would react. But after today...I realized that I'm more afraid of dying without ever living my truth, than I am about speaking it." Victor explains, shifting uncomfortably in the bed.

Benji's eyes widen, and he gives Victor a reassuring smile.

Victor thinks about Benji's words in his head.

I realized that I could've died, without ever really being who I was. So...I came out.

Victor gulps, taking a deep breath, "Mom...Dad...I'm gay."

He glances over to lock eyes with Benji, who's beaming proudly at him. All he can focus on in that moment is Benji's smile...and the hope that it brings.

_ It's going to be okay, because he loves Benji. _

_ Benji loves him back. _

_ They were going to be okay. _


	5. Chapter 5

Victor shifts his gaze from Benji to look up at his family...who had been silent for several minutes following his confession.

His parents eyes are wide with shock, looking taken aback by his words. They don't look angry, or disgusted...just, surprised.

Instead of panicking at their reaction, or lack of one, he shifts his gaze over to Pilar...who's smiling warmly at him. 

He then glances down at Adrian, who'd snuggled closer to him, looking up at him with a beaming smile and curious eyes.

"What's gay?" Adrian asks, breaking the tense silence in the room.

Pilar snorts, and Victor laughs softly...running a hand through his hair. 

"Well, hermano...uh..." Victor breathes out, trying to think of the best way to answer his little brother's question, "It means that I like boys...instead of girls." 

Adrian hums, "So...you kiss boys instead of girls?" 

Victor nods, "Yeah."

_ Well, he doesn't kiss just any boys. He's only kissed one, and that's the only one he wants to kiss. _

"Cool. So...why did you have to announce it? Isn't it normal for some boys to like boys?" Adrian asks curiously.

Victor smiles at his brother's innocence and blissful ignorance. He remembers when he was younger, living without a single clue of how complicated the real world actually was.

He sometimes wishes he could go back to those days. 

Victor nods, "It's _very_ normal for some boys to like boys, and even for girls to like girls. Or...people can like both. Sometimes people don't agree with it though, because of how they're raised when they're _your_ age...so that's why people need to announce it." he explains in a soft voice, tickling his brother's side...who giggles in response.

Adrian glances up at him with a smile, "So...how did you know _you_ liked boys?" 

Victor looks down at him, laughing softly, "Well...I had a girlfriend who I felt connected to. But...I didn't like kissing her."

"So...did you find a boy you _like_ kissing?" he asks.

He shifts his gaze over to Benji, who's smiling fondly at them...a hint of amusement written across his features. He keeps his eyes locked on him as he answers the question.

"Yeah...I did. And he made me realize that I like boys...and that it's okay." Victor breathes out, blushing under Benji's intense gaze.

Benji's lips part, and he blushes, looking down at the ground. 

"Cool." Adrian exclaims, snuggling closer to Victor.

Victor hugs him closer, nearly bursting into tears at the overwhelming love and appreciation he felt for his little brother in that moment.

He looks up at his parents, who are silently watching the interaction between him and Adrian...facial expressions unreadable.

He takes a deep breath, "Mami, Papi...I'm sorry for springing this on you right now, I know it isn't the best time but-"

Victor's mom cuts him off, "How long have you known?"

Victor immediately falls silent, taken aback by the question. He clears his throat, shrugging.

"Since before we moved from Texas. I was questioning for awhile but...I figured it out for sure once we moved here." Victor explains, voice quiet.

"Oh, mi amor..." She breathes out, sitting down beside him on the bed and grabbing his hand in between hers.

She's silent for a moment, "You have nothing to apologize for, mijo. I should be apologizing to you."

Victor tilts his head, "What?"

Isabel frowns, "You kept this to yourself for so long because you were afraid of how we would react. There were so many times that our family was insensitive, and made you feel as though we wouldn't accept you. I'm so sorry for making you ever think you couldn't tell us this."

Victor smiles softly, "It's okay, mami."

She shakes her head, reaching forward to brush a few loose strands of hair out of his face...resting her hand against his cheek.

"It's not. I want you to know that I love you with my entire heart, mi amor. And this doesn't change that. I am so proud of you..." She whispers.

Victor's eyes start to well up with tears, and he smiles...closing his eyes and leaning into the touch.

He feels a hand rest on his shoulder, and turns to see his dad standing beside him...a look of guilt on his face.

"Mijo...I'm sorry, too. It isn't any secret that your abuelos aren't accepting of these types of things. And sometimes, it may seem like I'm not either. I may not completely understand it, but I will try to...because you are my son, and I love you." Armando says, squeezing his shoulder.

Pilar walks over to rest a hand on his uninjured leg, smiling at him.

Victor closes his eyes, embracing the overwhelming love and support that is surrounding him. 

He was not expecting his family, especially his parents...to be so accepting. He was worried that once he said _the_ words...everything would change. That he would lose everyone he loved the most in his life.

Much to his relief, the opposite happened. 

"So..." Isabel says as she pulls away to look at Victor, "Are there any special boys that we should know about?" 

She smirks at him, and Victor feels a blush settle onto his cheeks. 

He doesn't answer, instead shifting his gaze towards Benji. 

"Yeah...there is someone special, actually." He breathes out.

His family all shift their gazes back to look at Benji, realization settling onto their features. 

Isabel smirks, turning to look at Victor, "Well...I have to say that I approve. _Es muy agradable a los ojos. Muy guapo._ "

Victor shoots her a horrified glare, "Mami!"

Adrian lifts his head off of Victor's chest, eyes darting around in confusion before landing on Benji.

"Benji's your boyfriend?! That's _so_ cool...it's like you're in a disney movie and he's your knight-in-shining-armor!" He squeals, clapping his hands together excitedly.

Benji raises an eyebrow, laughing silently.

Victor's eyes widen, "No, he's not my boyfriend..." he says quickly, lowering his voice and leaning down to whisper in Adrian's ear, "But I hope he will be soon."

Adrian smiles, "I know he will be. He likes you a lot."

Victor blushes, looking down at his lap.

"Yeah...I like him too, a lot."

Armando clears his throat, "Well...I think that you've all embarrassed Victor enough. Let's give him some time to rest."

Isabel nods, "Yeah. We should be getting Adrian home."

She reaches down to lift him from Victor's arms, setting him down on the ground. 

"Mijo...we'll be back to visit you later, okay?" She says, and Victor nods.

She smiles, leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead, brushing his hair out of his face. 

"I'm so glad you're okay, mi amor .  _Te quiero mucho mucha_." She whispers.

Victor smiles, " _Yo también te quiero._ "

Armando squeezes his shoulder, and Pilar leans down to give him a quick side hug. 

Isabel turns to look at Benji, walking over to him. She immediately pulls him into a hug.

"Thank you again, Benji." 

Benji smiles, awkwardly returning the hug. They pull away, and Armando walks over to him, extending his hand out.

They shake hands, and Armando turns to smile at Victor, "Firm handshake, he's a keeper."

Victor groans, covering his face with his hands and shaking his head. 

They all walk towards the door, waving goodbye before walking out...leaving Victor and Benji alone.

Victor glances up at Benji, sending him an apologetic look, "I'm sorry about...them." 

Benji shakes his head, laughing, "It's okay. I'm flattered that your family approves of me."

He walks over to Victor's bed, sitting down beside him and grabbing Victor's hand.

"Victor...I'm _so_ proud of you." Benji whispers, a fond smile on his face.

Victor's eyes widen, "Really?"

Benji nods, "Yeah. It takes a lot of strength to come out to your family, especially when you aren't sure how they're going to react."

Victor looks down at his lap, "Well...It's all thanks to you...you know."

He raises an eyebrow, "What?"

Victor tugs on Benji's arm, pulling him down so that he's laying beside Victor. He turns so that his head is resting on Victor's chest, slinging an arm over his waist. 

"Do you remember the conversation we had...that night in Willacoochie?" Victor asks quietly.

Benji nods, "Yeah...I told you about my accident."

"Yeah. You were talking about how you woke up in the hospital, and realized that you could've died, without ever really being who you are." Victor says, repeating Benji's words.

"Yeah." Benji whispers, face falling slightly.

Victor sighs, "After you said that...it made me think about how long I've been hiding who I was. And I realized...that I was so tired of hiding, of being afraid. I decided in that moment that I was going to come out, and..." he pauses, "I was going to come out to you."

Benji's eyes widen, and he immediately leans up to look into Victor's eyes, "You were?"

He nods, "Yeah. That's why I woke you up. And then...I panicked, and the next thing I knew I was kissing you."

"I know I was wrong for that, but...I don't regret it. Kissing Mia was just kissing but kissing _you_..." Victor says, "I never knew I could feel like _that_." 

Benji smiles softly, reaching a hand out to stroke Victor's cheek, "I don't regret it either, but I _do_ regret how I reacted. Especially now that I know you were going to confide in me...and I broke that trust."

Victor shakes his head, "You never broke my trust, Benji. But...that's not my point." 

Benji lays his head back down onto Victor's chest, snuggling in closer to him.

Victor gently runs his fingers through Benji's hair, "When I was laying in that hallway today...I couldn't stop thinking about what you said that night. I was so afraid that I would..." his voice cracks.

Benji rests his hand on top of Victor's...which is resting on his stomach, interlocking their fingers together.

"I was _so_ afraid that I was going to die...without ever being able to be me. And I was even more afraid that I wouldn't be able to tell you how I feel about you." Victor whispers, tears welling up in his eyes.

Benji nods, his eyes also growing teary, "I was afraid too, you know."

Victor glances down at him, frowning, "You were?"

"Yeah. When I heard that you were in that school, all that crossed my mind in that moment was how I needed to find you. I needed to find you...and tell you how I felt." Benji admits, fidgeting with the fabric of Victor's hospital gown.

"God...I was so afraid, Victor." Benji whispers, 

voice shaking.

Victor frowns, "It's strange but...I was oddly at peace with everything once you found me. All I needed to hear was that you didn't hate me, and that you knew how I felt...even if you didn't feel the same."

"I'm not sure I ever made peace with the idea of losing you. I refused to accept it..." Benji confesses.

"Well...you didn't lose me. And I'm alive because of you." Victor whispers, looking down at him, "You saved my life today, and so many times before this, Benji."

Victor smiles, "I wouldn't have gotten the chance to come out...the chance to be myself, if it weren't for you. Thank you, Benji...for not giving up on me." 

"I would never give up on you." Benji says softly. 

A comfortable silence falls between them, and a question appears in the back of Victor's mind.

"So...what happens now?" Victor asks.

Benji raises an eyebrow, "With what?"

"With us. I mean...we've established that we feel the same about eachother but, what happens next?" 

Benji pushes himself up so that he's looking at Victor, "Well...I think that we could give this a shot. You could be my boyfriend..." 

Victor's eyes widen, and Benji panics.

"That was probably too forward...I'm sorry. We could just start by going on a date, or-" Benji rambles, but he's cut off as Victor reaches up to rest a hand against his cheek.

He smiles, "Benji...I'd like nothing more than to be your boyfriend."

Benji lets out a sigh of relief, immediately leaning forward to press his lips against Victor's...his hands tangling in his hair. Victor pulls him closer, deepening the kiss. 

They pull away, foreheads resting together. 

"Wow..." Victor breathes out, laughing softly.

Benji nods, eyes wide, "Yeah..."

Benji slowly lowers himself back down beside Victor, laying his head back on his chest as their legs tangle together. 

A few minutes later, Benji glances up at Victor, smiling when he sees that Victor is sleeping...looking so peaceful and adorable.

He reaches up slowly, running a hand along the side of Victor's face...

Benji closes his eyes, focusing on the sound of Victor's heartbeat...a sound that he'd never been more happy to hear in his life. 

_He's alive. He's okay._

_They were going to be okay._


End file.
